If you ever wondered what happens when chaos meets confusion in a boxing ring, wonder no more, Speed Darlington aka Akpi just gave us a front-row seat to a legendary beatdown, courtesy of Zazuu Zeh himself, Portable.
The beef that boiled over
What started as random online gbas gbos between two of Nigeria’s most eccentric entertainers ended in boxing gloves and broken egos.
The so-called “celebrity boxing match” was supposed to settle the beef, but what we got was more of a one-sided demolition job than a fair fight.
Portable came in swinging like he was fighting for fuel subsidy, while Akpi? Well… Akpi fought like Wi-Fi with one bar signal struggling to connect.
The punch that silenced instagram live 🥊
According to ringside witnesses, the moment Portable landed that transformational uppercut, Akpi paused like a man who suddenly remembered he left beans on the fire.

People claim he dislocated his shoulder, but based on how quickly he sat down to re-evaluate life, it looked more like he dislocated his destiny.

Internet reacts: Akpi go home
Netizens wasted no time in turning the aftermath into a meme fest. Some were disappointed, others were confused, and many just wanted their data back.
But one thing everyone agreed on? Portable won the match

This wasn’t boxing. This was spiritual deliverance. The kind of flogging that makes a man think twice before clapping back on social media.
Daniel Regha Weighs In (Of Course)
In typical Daniel Regha fashion, he called it out for what it was: unserious.

But to be fair, when two grown men settle beef by entering a ring to trade punches instead of tracks, maybe society has taken a permanent seat in clown mode.
Akpi’s Legacy on Life Support
Speed Darlington has always marched to the beat of his own chaotic drum, but this might just be the humbling he never knew he needed.
Akpi fans are now in hiding, deleting tweets, and looking for someone else to stan before the next morning.

Who won the match?
Portable. No argument. Not only did he win physically, but he’s also now the certified Minister of Chaos and Punches.

Whatever PR stunt this was, he turned it into a full-on “Zazuu Championship” belt claim. We don’t know what’s next—maybe Portable vs VDM? Or Portable vs Taxes?
Either way, lesson learned: don’t beef a man who performs shirtless in winter and sings like he’s arguing with the beat.
Portable vs Speed Darlington fight